I Am Looking For Help. I Am A 30 Year

I am looking for help. I am a 30 year old mother of 3 children. Ex smoker of 3 years (about 1/3 a pack a day) but I stopped yearsssss ago. I have been battling "asthma" for 15 years. It started out minimal and I was on an albuterol inhaler. Now I say minimal as in I would have to take my inhaler once every 8 or 9 months for wheezing and shortness of breath. I progressively got worse. 10 years ago I was put on a steroided inhaler as well as a nebulizer machine along with my regular inhaler. I was taking my steroided inhaler twice daily, my albuterol inhaler almost twice a month and my machine was used when my inhaler wouldnt cut it. These episodes were worse in the manner that they were more frequent and would last longer. I progressively got worse. For the past 5 years I have been hospitalized a couple times a year. I take flovent or pro air...breo inhaler..singulair...duo neb...albuterol for neb..prednisone at each flare up (my flare ups are a few times monthly at this point) and still...I am progressively getting worse. I clench on to these inhalers like they are my life line. This past year the seizures started. I cant laugh or i cant breathe. I cant cough or I cant breathe. I am a paralegal...desk job....and i can be sitting there and flare out of no where. I cannot raise my voice or I cant breathe. I cannot speak a paragraph or I cant breathe (if I was to read this out loud I would pretty much die) I have to pace myself in every part of my life and even still I will flare. But these flares are worse because there is no air movement at all during the worst ones and extremely labored breathing during the mild ones. But during the bad ones.... I literally cannot breathe. If i were to put dust or ashtray or baby powder in front of my mouth during a flare I swear the particles would not even shift. I get ocular migraines now as well as chest pain. My cough sounds like a bark and I always feel like im drowning although scans are clear. I have gained about 45 lbs (now weighing in at 152) I am 5'7". My nebulizer treatmeants do not work unless I "OD" on them pretty much. For instance when I get to the hospital, they give me about 2-3 within an hours time followed by another 2-3 treatments. So much so that at one point they had to inject a drug into my IV and try to make my heart do a hard reset because the treatments sped me up way too fast. But at the end of the day they say its asthma....I dont feel like this is asthma anymore. I have had xrays and ekgs. All clear. When I go to bed I know that in about 20 minutes of laying down I will have to hit my inhaler because it feels as of whatever is in my lungs has settled but when it settles it feels like weights so when I shift I know that I will flare. I have a constant metal taste which is annoying. Diet wise I am a water, Sprite, or milk drinker and that is it. I eat a balanced diet of meats vegies etc. I flare multiple times a day...my doc has tweaked my doses and tried several different things for me and I am just worse. During a flare...if I am sitting up and i lay back, I sound like death. If i am upright I sound like death. If i am leaning forward it quiets. I cannot lay on my left side either...that is instant death. I am in the ER about every other week (my insurance hates me). Have I been exposed to Mold...yes....asbestos....i dont think so. I'm trying my hardest to cover all questions that could be asked. What is wrong. Someone help me.