I Am Suffering From Some Deep Postpartum. And I Seem

I am suffering from some deep postpartum. And I seem to have alienated my closest friendships from not being present when I'm with them and for saying insensitive things ( I was unaware until one of my close girl friends attacked me with accusations as she was fed up). They said they want to old me back and that they want to move forward. But one of them is just not allowing my efforts to be shown. I'm sick to my stomach because of this.