I Lived A Hard Life Lost My Mom At Age

I lived a hard life lost my mom at age 7 lost my dad at age 21 never knew him was in a car wreck have mental issues and physical issues.I can go on forever I do have GAD and etc...depression and stress alot I do have an autistic shid he is 8 almost that is love him alot.I was perscribed 60 count of my clonapins but I have a new female doctor now she only gives me 30 count and that hurt's me alot a doctor is susposed be a doctor right.I did go to mental health also I was on ativans but i did not want them no more.I am wanting to ask for a strong pill my fiance says valiums will work for me I get crazy mood swings like put my hands on my face and scream in a way I have a man who loves me and that is here for me that is what matter's I do have high blood pressure to I take pills for my heart .
she do noot no about if she does I do not think she understands .