I'm Suffering. I Started Pot A Year Ago. I Took

I'm suffering. I started pot a year ago. I took myself off trazadone, buspar ,sertraline, rx nausea pills, anti abuse. when I did, it made a huge difference. a list of differences. but I have no income and cant afford it. it is looked at so addictively that I feel like a druggy now. my parents who I live with now wont condone it. so I'm going back on the rx,s which will bring me back to zombieland. i see counseling every 1-2 weeks for years.
ive had rape, attemted to be killed by a man, divorce abuse homelessness, alchol addiction and more. I'm so tired. i KNOW I was born with disabilities ADHD. and have come to the conclusion i cant be helped. why did marjuauna work and why do i have to take those RX,s when that pot really helps ....