Hi Well I Was Abused As A Child And Now

hi well I was abused as a child and Now the past is catching up to me. only now did I realize that what had happened was sexual assault but the man has passed away now so no one will believe me. but all that had happened over the 10 years of abuse is on replay in my head I can't get it to stop, I can't eat or sleep properly and I'm lost in school because of this. and now every time a male comes near me I'm terrified and tense up or freeze. how do I make it all stop?