​i Have So Many Issues: My Mother Died Before 1.5

​i have so many issues:
my mother died before 1.5 months
my father died before 3.5 years
i am the only child of my parents
except my parents all people ignored me and make fun of me make fun of my face body and all
i hate my self i m obese person want to control but have no control
i m married but no child
i don't know my husband loves me or not i am very insecure because my husband is very good looking and i am not
sometimes i feel he is not real with me i don't know

i m confuse professionally i did nothing

i lost my self please help me