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Can A Father Compete With His Own Son And Want His Failure?

Posted on Thu, 4 Feb 2016

Question: is it possible to have a father who is jealous & competitive with his own son? who secretly wants to see his son fail, falter and suffer in his life? is that possible? for years i have been conflicted by these thoughts about my father. He can be very hurtful & conniving but, he can also portray himself as a well-wisher & friend when he wants something.

Answered by Dr. Seikhoo Bishnoi (21 minutes later)

Brief Answer:
Yes this is possible in some cases

Detailed Answer:
Hello, Welcome to Health Care Magic

I can understand your concern but need more details. Yes it's possible that a father might become jealous of success of his own son. This could be seen more commonly in alcoholics or individuals having some personality issues. I'd like to know if your father is alcoholic or have personally problems.

What incidents occurred that result in thinking that he wants you you to fail? Please elaborate.

Thanks

Take care

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar

Follow up: Dr. Seikhoo Bishnoi (5 hours later)

My family immigrated to the US 35 years ago. My father instantly turned to heavy drinking to cope with the stress of his new life in US. He would drink excessively every single night. He & my mother would fight excessively - my mother even attempted suicide a couple of times. For the last 35 years he has drank alcohol excessively. When I returned home from college he would get drunk & call me a loser cuz I lived at home briefly. Then I moved out and got married. During my marriage I had a difficult time. Once I went to the ER cuz of panic attacks. When I called my mother after I returned home to tell her- he was laughing in the background & making light of the fact that I was in the ER for panic attacks. Growing up he never let me have a social life- always wanted me to spend time w my brother. Would be angry if I found any source of pleasure like friendships.

Answered by Dr. Seikhoo Bishnoi (9 hours later)

Brief Answer:
Alcoholics are known to have personality issues.

Detailed Answer:
Hello again

He is a chronic alcoholics and chronic alcoholics in order to rationalise things can even become jealous and are prone to develop personality issues. Your mother also attempted suicide, the relationship between your parents is also not very good and both these things even aggravate personality issues. All these things can result in the issues you are facing at home. In my opinion you should try to concentrate on yourself and your family. Try not to pay attention on his behaviour because this will only make you feel bad. For panic attacks take proper treatment and try relaxation exercises.

Please don't hesitate to ask again for more doubts in follow up.

Note: For further guidance on mental health, Click here.

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Chakravarthy Mazumdar