Brief Answer:
Need to find cause and treat that directly

Detailed Answer:
Hello ma'am and welcome.

Thank you for writing to us.

I have gone through your query with diligence and would like you to know that I am here to help. You seem to be suffering from fecal incontinence, which can be caused due to any of the following conditions:

+Rectal prolapse
+Muscle injury
+Nerve injury
+Previous surgeries
+Scarring of the rectum that now causes it to accommodate less fecal matter, resolution in the expulsion of some fecal matter
+Rectocele
+Hemorrhoids
and a few others.

The treatment options include approaching the cause for fecal incontinence as we cannot really use one approach to treating this condition. But general approaches include:

+Continue drinking plenty of fluids and eat high fibre food
+Anti-diarrhea medications
+Exercises to increase anal sphincter strength
+Laxatives
+Implant in pelvis to increase sacral nerve stimulation and help with better control over your anal sphincter
+Fixing a time to pass your bowels everyday
+Surgery: Usually the best approach and most effective one as well. There are different surgical options available (e.g. sphincter replacement; treating the cause like haemorrhoids, rectal prolapse, etc; sphincteroplasty; etc.)

Please consult a gastroenterologist for further management of your condition, and as you have reported having a tender anal region, we should consider and rule out options like hemorrhoids, rectal prolapse, etc.

Best wishes.

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