Suggest Treatment For Premature Ejaculation

Posted on Sat, 22 Mar 2014

Medically reviewed by Ask A Doctor - 24x7 Medical Review Team

Sat, 22 Mar 2014 Answered on

Fri, 11 Apr 2014 Last reviewed on

Question : I have just started a relationship with a 61 year old man who has had his prostrate gland removed. He says he cannot ejaculate but also says he has no orgasams any more. He was able to hold an erection for a short period of time. Sex it appears is not particularly important to him. He said his surgery was about 3 years ago. When we started a relationship he assured me his bits were all working but obviously they aren't. I don't want a sexless relationship is there anything he can do or not?

Answered by Dr. Dr.Saatiish Jhuntrraa (19 minutes later)

Brief Answer: You need to talk to him regarding what you need Detailed Answer: Hello Thanks for choosing wwww.healthcaremagic.com. Prostectomy often leads to retrograde ejaculation . It means that instead of squirts of semen coming out , it goes in to urinary bladder. Such persons have normal organs in feeling but seamen will not come out. Therecan be some treatment for reversing the condition ,but it may be very difficult. Loss of sex desire in a 61 yr man can be due to reduced testosterone level, anxiety due to reterograde ejaculation or fear of failure. It can be fixed by checking serum testosterone level and. screening for anxiety / depression symptoms . He has to be reminded and assured that it is possible for him to have good sex life. If erection is an issue, different modes of treatment are available like medicines like sildenafil.tadalafil 10-20 mg or verdenafil Dr Saatiish jhuntrraa

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Vinay Bhardwaj

Follow up: Dr. Dr.Saatiish Jhuntrraa (13 hours later)

I can see there is treatment in some cases the problem is he doesn't see it as a problem. He seems quite sure he can't have an orgasm, he has not masturbated in all that time is it possible that he is right and he can't have an orgasm or is this in his head. I don't see how a successful relationship can develop if the man dosnt feel passion or lust for his partner, a friendship maybe but that's not what I am looking for. Can you give me a % chance that he is right and basically it's all over for him. Thanks.

Answered by Dr. Dr.Saatiish Jhuntrraa (3 hours later)

Brief Answer: Please talk to him regarding what you want Detailed Answer: Hello In today's world of modern medicine, sex is never all over, till the time you want. You can't force someone if he does't desire.He has high level of desire ,( though if the desire level has changed dramatically just recently, there can be some underlying cause like psychiatric problem, brain tumour or testicular growth), so he indulges in masturbation. Orgasm is between the ears, not between the legs. Discharge of semen ( between the legs) is associated with feeling of intense pleasure( between the ears) One can have either of these without the other. so may be, he reaches orgasm withmasturbation but not with vagiinal sex. Feeling of failure to do so has reinforced his thinking . Itispossible to correct this by appropriate counselling, provided he. is ready for it . It can be done on line as well You have to tell him exactly what you want. I may tell sexual pleasure is not limited to vaginal sex only, there so many other ways as well. so I think., he is erring in assuming that he an not have orgasm . If hehaswith masturbation, he an have with vaginal as well. Dr Saatiish jhuntrraa

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Yogesh D

Follow up: Dr. Dr.Saatiish Jhuntrraa (46 minutes later)

Could someone who understands English please reply to this. I said he has NOT masturbated in all that time ,so he has NOT had any orgasms. If he had, had organisms masturbating obviously he could probably have them attempting sex. I want to know if his medical procedure could have made him unable to orgasm at all. If thats the case he would be unable to have passion in his life which is unacceptable to me.

Answered by Dr. Dr.Saatiish Jhuntrraa (1 hour later)

Brief Answer: Ejaculation and orgasm are different things Detailed Answer: Hello NO, the medical procedure will not affect and can't disturb the orgasmic feelings. What I can understand from your description is that you are interpreting discharge of semen as orgasm but it is not true. Orgasm is felt in brain and no procedure has been done there. Inability to ejaculate is common after prostate surgery, but nothing to do with orgasmic feelings. so he may be unable to ejaculate but no issues with orgasm. I tried to explain that these are two different things. Secondly, there are lots of people who can reach orgasm with masturbation either by self or a partner but unable to achieve this with vaginal sex. He knows it so avoiding vaginal sex but was practicing masturbation due to sex desire . Now either he has stopped masturbating deliberately or his desire has actually gone down because he is not able to understand what to do. This things can only be clarified by talking to him. I shall be glad to answer any more query. DR SAATIISH JHUNTRRAA

Above answer was peer-reviewed by : Dr. Yogesh D