Dear Welcome to HCM We understand your concerns I went through your details. I suggest you not to worry much. I sincerely think that you are troubled with paranoid personality disorder. You need to change it as soon as possible. This personality disorder could develop into serious condition such as paranoia. Please consult a psychiatrist / psychologist for detailed assessment and diagnosis. Start trusting your friends. The slowly develop the circle. If you require more of my help in this aspect, Please post a direct question to me in this website. Make sure that you include every minute details possible. I shall prescribe the needed psychotherapy techniques which should help you cure your condition further. Hope this answers your query. Available for further clarifications. Good luck.