Hello andrea
thanks for your question
the problem you are having is really bad and I can understand it. You want to run of relation but in the mean time you love your children and can't leave them. You are trying to cope but are failing to do so, you are feeling suffocated and you just want to run.
See, when ever we are exposed to continuous stress be it physical or mental our body tend to get rid of this stress. But when body fails to do so we can develop behavioral symptoms, irritability, distress, crying spells etc.
It can not be labelled as frank depression but as per my opinion its Adjustment Disorder with depression like symptoms. So please try to believe in your self and spend good time with children. Try to talk with your partner if you can, regarding your problem. Some times we can avoid problems just by talking.
Try to remember your good time and try to get in same pace. Practice yoga or meditation for mental calmness. You can visit family physician for episodic control of anxiety.
Try to see life in a positive prospective.
THANKS AND TAKE CARE
I hope I cleared your doubt or you can ask question again

Hello,

Welcome to HCM.

It is nice to know that you love your children. Never leave them, children need mother more than anything in the world. Life is a roller coaster, everyone in struggling. Do not try to run away from problems, find ways to solve them. Stress is a part of everyone's life these days, some can cope well while the more sensitive ones either get anxious, tensed or depressed.

Remember when life gets tough, the tougher get going. You are in this world for some reason, just relax and get control over your self.

Drink plenty of water, soups, juice to stay cool. Deep breathing exercises and yoga will help you relax and get rid of stress. Regular exercises and meditation will help you stay mentally and physically fit.

Work out your personal problems with your spouse, get stronger. Have confidence in yourself and stop behaving panicky. You can take the help of a counselor, both of you may need counselling.

If you think things are not well, don't get broken consult a psychiatrist and get diagnosed and treated well. Take natural mood elevators, anti-depression tabs should be taken only after consultation with a doctor.

Try your best to lead a normal life for your children. Take care.